Author: Corgi Hollows

Choices must be made.

Today I choose to be grateful! I choose to do what I don’t want to do; exercise, listen to music, breathe in the fresh spring air, stare at the sky.

So many of us are affected by depression. The dark panic that closes in at times can be suffocating, frightening. This gray time of year is a surprise pitfall for us. The beauty and expectancy of spring is marred by lack of color and whimsical weather.

As believers in Christ we know the truth and have a foundation for blessings and praise. I can choose to praise God in my darkness.

Inevitably that will help me.

I took my B vitamins, D and C. I ate my handful of cashews.

But the road is hard! Spiritual battles are happening all around us. I am burdened with other’s burdens, not to mention the ones I’m carrying.

And yet I tell myself that God knows the end game. He isn’t going to leave me hopeless. I will adopt the attitude of gratefulness and expectancy.

I will put my trust in Him, the Ruler of Creation.

It’s the waiting game.

Pray for us who struggle with depression.

It’s all in the attitude.

And Jesus knows.

Come Lord Jesus. Come soon. We are waiting for Your glorious appearing.

MARANATHA!

Well, we made it!

The deep cold is over, the sun is out and almost all our snow is melted. I am accepting practically every subbing job coming my way, even if I struggle with a particular age group or subject. God provides.

I get to visit the laundromat now, which is always interesting to me. What a slice of society I meet.

My friends are praying for me, for solutions to my house repairs, for wisdom and guidance. I need wise counsel because I have NOT A CLUE about mound systems/septic systems.

I know God sees. He provides. He will help.

In my international Bible Study (Chinese) there is a gentleman who has had contacts with construction folk and he indicated he would try to link me with reputable help. See? God is working. We will see what is next.

I just don’t want to be “taken to the cleaners.”

Though I do visit the laundromat willingly 😉

Cherie and I did lose Gandalf last week. He went downhill pretty fast last Thursday, and we were (thankfully) able to get an appointment in Buffalo to have him put down. He was sweet to the last minute.

We wept our way home. Burial will follow, as the ground is still frozen. He will join Lacey, Blackberry, Misty, and Kiwi. My heart aches as I think of these precious pets! I like to think of them playing with Brian, Sera, and Jean up in heaven.

Sera and Jean are our two little ones that didn’t make it.

I fully expect to meet them in heaven.

But here on earth we wait. I never pray for patience. You know what happens when you do? Lessons are learned. I’m waiting for enough already.

I pray for strength and wisdom and help for each day.

I chose to take a day off to get some errands and financial stuff done today. I’m thankful, because I woke up feeling under the weather. Stress, probably.

I’ll try to zip around town and get everything done— tomorrow I’m doing a double job subbing; Second Grade in the morning and Middle School art in the afternoon.

This is my colorful and varied life.

I wouldn’t trade it!

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It took five years to feel confident about living alone and facing life single.

I never dreamed I’d be alone in my senior years. I always pictured us growing old together, having a blast camping and traveling, enjoying our music and our reading, discussing politics and theology.

It took five years to become rather selfish and content with living life alone! I don’t feel the need to remarry anymore. I felt so incompetent for so long. I hadn’t done so many things for 30 years! Finances, bills, repairs, car stuff, house stuff, —-all that hadn’t been my thing. Brian did it all.

Now it’s mine. With fear and trembling I took it all on again, and now, five years later I survived.

How selfish of me! I make my own decisions (with prayer, of course!) and live life by myself. Being single is really a selfish thing.

I am more and more of an advocate of early marriage as I see trends around me and in myself.

Being married is an incubator for selflessness.

It’s really difficult for people who are set in their ways to submit wholeheartedly to someone else.

The benefits of marriage seem pretty slim to anyone selfish.

Having been married for 30 years, and single now for awhile I stand in some authority to have an opinion!

Marriage is a wonderful thing! Children are glorious gifts from God!

Marriage is hard, though, and one MUST surrender wholly to its demands. It is the perfect lesson in submission.

I am so glad I was married, for quite some time. I know the demands and the benefits and I actually miss being married!

I see my selfish decisions these days and I am embarrassed! It’s weird to just decide what I want and do it.

Like I said, I’m getting used to it after five years, and it would be hard to go back to being selfless in many ways.

Our pastor has spent two weeks talking about marriage. He used Ephesians 4:31-32 as his text. Kindness and forgiveness must characterize a marriage.

When those two things are the constant a marriage will be blissful.

When malice is absent in marriage it will be the easiest relationship to maintain.

We are fallen humans, though, so forgiveness must be practiced. Constantly.

Boundaries in marriage, accountability to God, consequences of organic problems are all realities. Kindness and forgiveness can only be positive forces in this most important covenant relationship on earth. It was an excellent series. Short and truly sweet.

Widowhood has its deep sorrow, difficulties, darkness, and pain. But selfishness is also a part of it.

Because I recognized this pitfall especially this past year I chose “service, purpose, and faith” as my words to characterize 2025. I want to be of service. I want to have God’s purposes in my life. I want my spiritual antennae to grow again after trauma took them out. Faith must characterize my life.

I will die if Jesus isn’t my central focus. I must live for Him. This must cancel out my selfishness.

Yet I still make decisions, little and big.

What a responsibility!

So today I do stuff. Stuff we all do. I am drinking coffee by the fire this morning as I write. Yukichan is at my feet. Corwyn is grunting at squirrel activity outside the front window.

This morning I heard the chickadee singing a spring call. I expect robins will turn up soon. It’s still a gray world out there. No green. Sunshine is plentiful and gentle air encourages the creatures to begin anew.

I am also encouraged.

MARANATHA!

I am plagued by worry these days.

I know that Christ commands us to Not Worry. I read a hint that praying for others can be a remedy for worry. I do pray for others. I pray through my “snatch list” in the morning, and as people cross my path during the day I pray for them—sometimes over and over.

My cousin is sick. I pray for her to get better every time she comes to mind, which is often.

I pray for my children and my grandchildren.

Something else that combats worry is counting blessings. It may be way below zero in temperatures this week, but today the sun is shining and after this bitterly cold week we may be seeing warmer days. I see pictures of spring on social media. Blossoms in Japan, sunny beaches in the Mediterranean, green grass in the south! It’s not even close to being spring this week here.

But it is sunny.

Gandalf is fading away. Our hearts are broken. Cherie and I cry. We just don’t want to bring him in to be put to sleep. We want to hope that he can win this game against liver malfunction. Our vet diagnosed liver disease, but he told us that it would be extremely difficult to figure out why Gandalf has it, and costly, and there would be little chance of recovery even with a diagnosis.

But miracles. We still can pray for miracles.

I’m complaining more than counting here, today.

Someone told me that my septic mound system may need complete replacement. They only last about 30 years, and that is how old my system is.

Remember that I’ve just waterproofed the basement, rerouted the drainage, replaced the pipe under the house—–I’ve trouble-shot so many things already.

And yet I just love to live here in this beautiful “hollow,” nestled under the highest point in Hennepin County.

It is worth it to repair and make this place habitable. When I am gone it will be sold, and whenever sold it must be in good condition.

For now my cozy fireplace is on, the sun is streaming in, and I am thankful for being warm. I’m thankful for my sweet Corgi, my Rat Terrier, my cats. All lend warmth and comfort.

I’m thankful for music! I’m thankful for my church. I’m thankful for books and art supplies and yarn and needles to knit!

I’m thankful for the lakes and fields and forests that I love to see and walk through, swim in.

I’m thankful for health. I love to be mobile, to swim, to breathe deeply and move around freely.

I’m thankful for God’s provision! Jehovah Jirah, the LORD provides! He has never let me down.

I’m thankful for friends, family, my mom, my kids, my grandkids. How lovely they all are, how blessed I am.

I’m thankful for safety and peace, knowing full well that God’s plan is unfolding steadily, day by day, with His people in positions of leadership and service for Good and for Evil.

I am thankful for Jesus. I couldn’t live without Him.

Come quickly, Lord! MARANATHA!

In this world you will have trouble. That’s a truth universally known. Jesus tells us to take heart, though, and we must obey.

It’s a week of hearts. Valentine’s Day is Friday, and the kids at school are primed for the parties. I’m subbing in music and there are some cute songs modified to celebrate the holiday. Third grade is performing them, and they really enjoy singing them.

I’ve had trouble, though. Could use your prayers.

My septic system froze this past weekend, ahead of the really sub zero temps we are having right now, for an extended time.

I was told I will probably have to wait until late spring/summer for the system to thaw out. Ya.

Until then I can periodically pump out the tanks. Very costly. The gray water gets hauled away instead of flowing into the mound.

We are scrimping around here. It’s like camping, sort of: paper plates, short showers, careful usage of water that is draining into the system. It’s just a “pain-in-the-neck.”

I’m so thankful for a furnace that can combat these arctic temperatures. This house is needing a complete overhaul, apparently.

The new little room under the front step of the house (the one that was completely not accessible before the basement waterproofing people came) is just part of my ongoing “adventure” in home repair and upkeep. “Little surprises” are becoming normal.

Life is hard.

But in acceptance lies peace.

I learned that many years ago when I lost my fourth child to miscarriage, when another tragedy struck simultaneously. I recall being paralyzed with pain and horror, sadness.

In acceptance lies peace.

I learned that from a book by Hannah Hurnard. She wrote a pair of books, “Hinds Feet on High Places,” and “Mountains of Spices.” I love those books. I grew up reading them several times. I should probably revisit them soon.

God is good all the time. It may seem like things are falling apart. God holds the master strings, the tape, the glue, the screws and bolts, nails and fasteners. Perhaps I cannot see which things He is using at a given time, but I trust I will see a bigger picture when I am with Him someday.

It’s Valentine’s Day —-week.

I made a chocolate cake. I had some and froze the rest of it. Do you ever get hungry for chocolate cake? Brian used to love it with a glass of cold fresh milk.

I’m spending my Valentine Week with some sweet memories.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

MARANATHA!

It was in the fall of 2022 that I got to a church service/event for those grieving, invited by my friend, in the wake of my dad’s passing. Of course, I was also grieving my husband’s unexpected death, my brother and sister-in-law’s tragic death, my family disunity, and the many pressing issues that I was seeking to navigate at that time.

The service was meaningful. I was so stiff with grief, but something opened in me that night and I cried. There was an offer of prayer for individuals at the service, and I went to the person who was praying.

Her prayer for me was sweet and comforting, but the words I remembered her praying over me were “love, beauty, and peace.” Striking words for one who is grieving.

I let those words swirl in my mind and decided to pray them as blessings for my new year, 2023.

So began a journey.

That year I was always piqued to see where those words showed up in my life. It became a real blessing. I looked for beauty. I found it so many places, and I saw it as a blessing and gift from God.

I sought peace and found it, as I faced my trials and tribulations of doing life alone.

I saw love in my life, whether it was from a pet, one of my children, a friend, or God. I remembered the love I had experienced. Love was a hard one. When you are lonely for your mate you feel the absence of it. That becomes the prevailing outlook. Love was a bit of a challenge to see that year.

I chose three words for 2024: Balance, Boundaries, and Health. That’s a whole blog post, perhaps, again, as I look back at the year from January. I need to scroll down to see where these words appeared last year. More later?

But for 2025 I’ve settled on service, purpose, and faith.

It’s the end of January, and I am looking for these words and ideas of them. I find them constantly. I want purpose, I want to be of more service, and I want my faith to grow. I may be old, but there is still time to see these things in my daily life.

Walking with Jesus is a journey, an adventure, an opportunity.

So, today I will see my purpose. I hope to be of service, and I want to spend time with my Lord.

Faith, Service, Purpose.

MARANATHA!

For the past four years my interests have centered on China. I’ve been asked “why?” so many times, so I’m going to list my reasons. This is a rather personal post, so it may only interest those of you who took the time to ask me.

There are many people from China who relocated here in Minnesota years ago. My family connected with several of them.

My best friend was an MK in China.

Since 1999 my husband and I hosted dozens of Chinese students at our home, including one very special young man who refers to me as his American mom.

In my Master’s Degree studies I had a Hmong professor who was excellent. He piqued my interest in East Asia. I took a class about NGO’s in Asia with him.

After my husband died I went through a time when I wanted to be as far away from “here” as possible: China.

I started reading about China. I started learning the history of China.

I was connected to an NGO named “Tai Initiative” through friends and pursued a COO position with that organization. During Covid this fizzled, but it still exists and it was part of my education.

I began Chinese language studies.

I began to attend a Chinese/International Bible Study in my area.

I spent more time at the Minneapolis Institute of Arts which has a premier collection of Asian artifacts.

I realized the strength and power of China, its huge population, its blossoming society, deep culture, and its role politically and spiritually.

I became aware of my own prejudices regarding China, and my views began to change, perhaps along with China itself.

Ed and Cherie started learning Japanese and Korean, respectively, while I began my Chinese studies. We had the Asian language trifecta!

I continue to become closer to several Chinese students living here in Minneapolis.

China is worth understanding deeply. It is a world power with a vast history and a strong people. There is much to admire in their fastidious devotion to respect and tradition.

Despite the Communist Revolution, China is on track to be the most Christian nation in the world. More devout Christians live in China than in any other country, including the USA. This, in turn, blesses this vast country.

Despite the Three Self Movement Chinese Christians who truly know Christ are thriving under persecution.

Chinese society is evolving at a pace that astounds. Scholars and politicians cannot keep up with the changes occurring monthly/weekly/daily in this huge land. Communism is the official form of government but capitalism reigns. Money multiplies with a billion people as the market.

Persecution is a reality.

Ancient Eastern Religions (including ancestor worship) are significant influences on Chinese culture, despite Communist Atheism.

These are things I’ve come to know through studying China. I am fascinated.

I look forward to a visit there soon, and plans are brewing.

The landscape of China is amazing, with scenic spots everywhere. Climate variation, as well, colors the country.

Yes, there is a Serpent. He gets his way in this culture. It’s very obvious.

But God is greater. God really loves the Chinese people. Their language shows evidence of The One True God throughout. They are not far from His heart.

I’m so thankful for all the seeds sown by Gladys Aylward and Hudson Taylor, other pioneer missionaries to China. Their work has taken root and is producing great fruit.

It’s amazing to be interested in this vast thing called China.

I’ve been blessed.

Mild weather continues for Minnesota, but the temps have been chilly. A dusting of snow came yesterday and it made for slick intersections on the way to school today.

Things burn all around, affecting some of us terribly. I have family that evacuated from the fires in California. They are okay, and I’m praying their home is also fine.

This week I’ve been subbing, being quiet, wrapping up holiday stuff. School started the day after the new year, so there was a relatively short break.

Artificial Intelligence has been on my mind lately. I determined to sound off a bit on this subject weeks ago, as I affirm ideas in my own mind even I as jot them down here on Corgi Hollows.

Danger! Warning! Things may not be as they seem!

I have virtually checked out of mainstream media. At the hotel we tune in the weather channel, so I see weather patterns more than anything while I’m there.

I don’t use the television in my home much. Cherie and I watch an old DVD once in a while. I can get PBS on it (I think) but I usually don’t watch television.

I read the headlines on a conservative site, Lucianne, once or twice a week. Apple News also give headlines.

Basically I am “off grid” when it comes to news.

Why?

I know how hyped the lifestyle of a news junkie can be. One can stress one’s self out over the daily feed of headers.

Add to the mix artificially manufactured information and you have the danger of real stress.

Recently someone I know learned a bit of news that was not true. The information was very believable. She completely believed it. It took some time to ferret out the truth, but the danger had been real. She’d been taken in by artificial intelligence.

Christians seem to be more easy to persuade. We trust people pretty easily. We want to believe the best about people. We trust each other because we know we are accountable to God Himself.

If information comes from a “Christian” source we tend to believe it.

What a prime opportunity for an evil one to exploit!

I write this as a warning to myself more than anyone. We, in the end-times prophecy community, are watchers. We observe the course of history and measure it against a Biblical guideline. It is absolutely clear that the conditions for a one-world government under an anti-Christ are present.

It is absolutely clear that Jesus IS coming again, and probably soon.

As many preachers have said; WATCH ISRAEL!

We see the ebb and flow of nations that either condemn or condone Israel.

Is God’s Word true?

God keeps His promises. I choose to believe that Scripture is God’s inerrant Word. Too many people have abandoned this premise. People I really thought would never drift from this truth!

The mocking of those of us who still believe is effective, and many have succumbed. It’s hard to stand against the intelligentsia elite who regularly undermine the authority of Scripture.

But they are only wise in their own eyes.

God’s Word is true, and those of us who “simplistically believe” it are far better off than those who parse away the clear teachings of the Lord.

Give me simplicity! I’ll be simplistic for all my days, trusting Scripture over a theologian and his/her interpretations.

This is an avenue of safety regarding artificial intelligence as well. A solid (and simple) worldview will clear up a whole lot of confusion.

I’m starting this year with three words of blessing: Purpose, Service, and Faith. I pray these words for myself everyday as I pray my “snatch list.” (Jude 23)

I want to cultivate these things in my life in 2025. January has started, and getting a heavy diet of Scripture each day has already begun for me. Out of this comes direction and understanding.

I do not claim any deep or profound truths. I claim Jesus who is the truth. “I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life.” Jesus said this—-according to Scripture.

I’ll believe it. I’m a simple soul.

Jesus is coming soon.

MARANATHA!

A lovely day has dawned, and we are to celebrate Jesus today.

I’ve been texting Christmas greetings around the world this morning, and my heart thrills that even if Christmas has a secular bent I see rejoicing, and the reason we rejoice is really because God is with us, Emmanuel, Messiah coming as a baby.

It’s wonderful to celebrate.

I realize that many (most) of the world sees Christmas as an excuse for Kentucky Fried Chicken, Cake, presents, a tree lit up with color and baubles—expectation, joy, peace on earth.

But in that distraction there is a baby.

For unto us a child is born, a son is given, and His name shall be called wonderful counselor, mighty God, everlasting father, Prince of Peace.

Powerful.

There is snow on the ground and balmy temps. It’s a setting at Corgi Hollows that is perfect for a romp in the field with the dogs. Cherie has lit the log fire. I’m in my spot by the gas fire (you know where I sit if you’ve visited Corgi Hollows!) Yuki is on on my lap with the chromebook.

She is always seeking warmth with her short fur. Corwyn has a thick coat, so although she loves laptime she gets overheated easily.

Yuki snuggles for hours.

The Swedish potato sausage that I bought at Engebretson’s in Minneapolis will go in the oven shortly. Ed made dozens of Swedish meatballs, our own special recipe with allspice and garlic, cloves and apple. They are addicting.

Grandma is tasked with making the rice pudding—hiding an almond for the first one to open a present tonight.

We keep the Scandinavian tradition of celebrating on Christmas Eve.

As a child Santa Claus was not a part of our household. That’s how I was raised. I guess it was somewhat unique, but my memories are of a Christmas Day with little fanfare, but basking in the lingering warmth of the evening before.

My family celebrated Jesus. Christmas was really about Jesus all along for us. The music of Christmas worshiped Him, told of Him, evoked deep praise in our hearts and minds.

So today is filled with food preparation. I will finally wrap presents for my five grandchildren. (Why do I always wrap presents on Christmas Eve?!)

I love hearing from you. Merry Christmas, dear friends! I send you love, and wish you joy and peace, beauty and laughter, health and blessings this season of wonder.

You are loved.

God is really taking good care of me. I testify to His provision and His goodness.

I still want to make some suggestions of how to bless a widow you may know of. There are those moments when “normal stuff” can be daunting to a widow with waning physical strength.

Recently Cherie and I needed to change an iron water filter in our system. It needs to be done every four months or so. We puzzled and strained over it before we (she) got it unscrewed and replaced. Victory!

Sometimes there’s a piece of something missing somewhere and it just needs a handyman’s touch.

Usually our needs have to do with plumbing, but I’ve had a guy from church check my tires. I often fear things that could go wrong with one of our vehicles. I try to keep them up and take them to the car care people regularly. Still, stuff happens…

If I lived in a community where all the maintenance was provided I’d probably be better off, but I am loath to leave my home and my family here.

Think about ways you can bless a widow in your acquaintance. I’m sure you know one. She will probably not be quick to ask for help. No one wants to be a pest. She probably has something a handy person could help with.

Speaking from experience.

BTW I am blessed by my five wonderful children, and their willingness to show up when I am desperate. I just share the thoughts of vulnerability that crop up in my thinking at times, and I know my widowed sisterhood shares these concerns.

It’s Christmas. Think of blessing her.

It was about a month ago when I woke up feeling sort of sad and needing a hug. I said to God, “You know, we humans need a hug every once in awhile.”

Ed had mentioned to me awhile back that “studies show humans need 13 hugs a day for optimal mental health.”

Well, that ain’t happening with Miss Corgi.

ANYWAY

God has a keen sense of humor.

Recently I picked up one of my Bible Study friends for supper. She is a researcher at the University.

She got into the truck with a big fat bag.

“I have something for you. It’s been hanging in my closet for two years. It’s from China. I will never wear it. I feel like a polar bear when I put it on.”

A beautiful furry coat was gifted to me. I tried to dissuade her from giving me such a beautiful garment. I said we’d shop for the right outfit for her to wear it with…That she should show courage to be a polar bear….

I have the coat. I have worn it since!

I look like a polar bear and EVERYONE wants to hug me!!!

The ladies at the dentist office yesterday just sang out, “Can I hug you?!”

“Yes! Of course!” Ha ha ha ha !!!!

So far only a few strangers have asked to hug me.

Mostly it’s people I do know.

My friend is missing out. God is laughing.

Give me a hug!